Well Done Fillet has mapped our brain. And he has done it pretty well, although I think it’s a bit negative. It’s the brain of a waiter who doesn’t really loves his job and I hope that my tip-section in my brain (if any…) is not that big.
A relatively easy way to entertain your little guests is drawing. You can draw whatever you want, but everybody loves Mickey Mouse! Here we go!
There are various books about this subject. I bought one in the Disney studios for less than 10 euros, it’s one of my best investments ever. Of course there are also a lot of sites about this subject, for example Dragoart. Have fun!
you can explain the buffet or take an order in six languages, but can’t chat about the weather in those languages
you’re looking to the other side of the table when you place your plate (used to synchronized serving)
you’re checking all those restaurantweblogs before you’re going to sleep at 4.00 am
you’re roommate is piling the plates (“much faster”) but you’re really gone much faster with the normal technique
you’re reading the mentality of people on the way they deal with servicepersonel – not only crazy waiters do, even CEO’s do 😉
you’re making the tables in the Harrods, LaFayette or other shops perfect and put the spoons in the right way
you have always your wineopener with you
you know all the restaurants of the country with one, two or three michelinstars by heart
you’re asking quickly a bottle of water when the others at the table want to ask for tapwater
you’re paying the bill of the restaurant with your creditcard (because you hate when they pay seperatly), your friends are amazed that you count their money that quickly and you wait for ages before the others without money pay you back
you’re putting secretly 10 euros in the checkfolder before leaving – because the other people on the table tip badly
One of my favorite crazy waiter acts is the living statue. Sometimes with a reason, sometimes without a reason I stand still for a while. Kids love it!
Ingrid Bergman gives a virtuoso solo performance in this Jean Cocteau one-act called The Human Voice. The plot of this hour-long piece is a simple one: a woman, devastated after her lover leaves her for someone else, speaks to him on the phone one last time. (in the theatre and I suppose also here in this fragment, there’s nobody on the phone of course)
You can talk on an imaginary phone (use your POS card!) with an imaginary person. Also when a kid plays with something (that looks) like a telephone, you can play this improvisation. A month ago, I talked with a Romanian kid. She understood nothing (I talked Italian) and I understood nothing! But we both (and everybody around us) had fun!
Welcome to the Crazy Waiter University! Here you’ll find all the information how to become a Crazy Waiter yourself. All the inspiration for Having fun and sharing fun with happy smiling guests!
I’m not a waiter because I’m stupid or I had to do something. I’m waiter because I like to serve and find children fun to work with. See ‘background’ for some theoretical information (now in Dutch, but soon to be translated) I hope to share my knowledge and inspiration with this weblog!